Dear Suki By BG from Midlands Area Dear Suki, I have really have a problem. It all started a year ago i got into a famous uni near the Midlands and started my BSC degree. I started off really badly and needed help from my tutor who was from America. I used to go and seek assistance from her during my free time and gradually i got better in my course (i will not reveal was course i am doing as i can be traced like that). Anyway one day she told me too meet her in the canteen as she was out for lunch, i met her there, and she really felt like having a pizza down the local pizza place. There we ordered our food and drinks, afterwards we went to the local pub and both of us got stoned then she insisted that we discuss my problem at her place, Thats when we had our first `embrace`. After we sobered up we releasded what we had done and i promptly left. I avoided her for a few days. After about 2 weeks i decided to talk, then it became aparent that the `embrace` had feeling for us, and that we were in love. (Note the pizza place we went to, my girlfriends, friends, Boyfriend worked there but i didn`t know about this until i met him later, when it was too late) Eventually my girlfriend started to get suspicous after she went to the local pizza place we went to and spoke to who she knew well and he told her about us. She was not amused and dumped me straight. But she didnt stop there. My (so called) freinds found out, and they started to post private messages on the internal network of computers in the uni and eventually she got wind of it and came to me. The Dean of the uni found out too and called us both in we denied the accusations, said that she would lose her job and he make sure that she would never get another job again. She denied it again. We were forced to see less of each other. Now my course is nearly over and i`m asking her too leave with me but she is too scared that her career will be ruined, plus i think she is up the spout and i think she is it from hiding me. Please help. I dont know what to do especially as my parents dont know about this. I am 22 now and she is 27 miggybyte has changed certain parts of the above letter to protect the parties involved. Dear BG, The first thing you need to do is to find out for certain whether or not your tutor is pregnant or not. If she is then it's imperative that she gets expert medical attention. Of course if she is pregnant, then you are going to need to do a lot of talking. She may be hiding it from you at the moment because she is unsure of your reaction. Be as supportive as you can, as she'll need help deciding whether or not to go ahead with the pregnancy. Now that your course is nearly over I can see no reason why you shouldn't continue with your relationship. It needn't affect her career adversely; surely there are other universities she could transfer to if she wants to be with you? This is the main issue you need to discuss - whether you both see a future in this relationship or not. Does she want to be with you, or is the fear of ruining her career merely a convenient opt-out clause? Now that you are no longer in the tutor/pupil relationship there should be nothing preventing you both from making a go of things, if you both want to. If she does turn out to be pregnant, and she does decide to keep the baby, then your parents are going to have to know eventually. It's probably best to tell them sooner rather than later. Once they've got over the initial shock they may turn out to be very supportive - stranger things have happened. You have to work out what you want, as well. Are you prepared to take on a baby at 22? It's only fair to discuss these things with her, then you both know where you stand. Do let me know how things work out, Suki END ===